Wedding Babblings

Oopsies.
I did start writing an entry yesterday, but I got tired and fell asleep, then lost the page. looool.

Anyways, it seems kinda crazy that the wedding is on Caturday. It felt like "Gah, the wedding is so far away!" and suddenly it's like "O SHT TEH WEDDIN' IS IN A F#*$ING WEEK!!!1". Yep. That's it basically.
Mother and I (Kay, I'm kidding, I don't call her mother, I was just trying to amuse myself and sound old-school-y at the same time) have been doing some tidying up the last few days, and today and tomorrow we will be too, and probably a lot of last minute things like finding the pom-pom things for the car since they're still lost in this crazy house. Also wrapping presents, and moving stuff into the shed so there's a bit more room in the house (yet it still looks insanely crowded in here to me). And I'm pretty excited for Wednesday, Wednesday feels like the beginning of the...wedding week, I guess? Because to me, that's when all the stuff that's been planned/worked on for so long is actually starting to come together, also both the Sara/h's and Daphne will be here, so it will be like, constant wedding stuff I think. I just hope everything goes good. And I hope everyone COMMUNICATES (unlike in some BG's on WoW...) and gets everything done on time! Yay.

RP/PVP?

Well, I've been playing a bit on a PVP server, and wow. There is a huge difference between RP and PVP. First, the maturity and IQ level of people on PVP servers seems insanely low. No word of a lie. RP, mostly everyone types in full sentences and has decent grammar and punctuation (not everyone, but a lot more than on PVP). PVP...there are a lot of people that I have to go "...what?" because I honestly can't figure out what they're saying. Also, people on PVP servers SUCK at instances. You would think that they'd be okay at them, since you get a lot of nice twink gear from instances...but no, this doesn't seem to be the case. They don't look at each others health and go "Oh shit, someone hit the priest, I better take aggro off the priest!" nope. They're much too HARDCORE for that. They just let the priest die, then go "WTF HAPPENED?" and blame the poor little priest, who is usually go "help!!". Also, LFG is hell on PVP servers. You finally get into a group, and right as you're typing "Hi", the other person leaves without a word. This has happened to me so many times that I'm beginning to think that I've got some crazy disease or something. But apparently it happens a lot. Basically, people have no manners. Also, when you DO finally get into the instance, it's normal for people to just randomly leave without saying anything. I'm used to hearing "Okay guys, this is just lame and we obviously can't handle this. I'm out.", or some excuse "Oh shit I forgot I have to work today!", whatever. That's fine, as long as they actually tell you why they're suddenly ditching you.


And yeah, I know this doesn't apply to all RP & PVP servers...and not everyone is this bad/good. But, I'm just ranting slightly. I feel dizzy now, so sleepy time.

I'm Broke...

This is probably going to be really ranty...and...complainy. All sorts of things I guess, since this last week has been....very eventful.

So, yeah. Altogether, this week was a lot of fun, and I'm glad I was around for everything. Buuut...I'm fucking BROKE. I've spent probably around $800 in the last two weeks. And yes, I'm fucking serious. I think it was even more than $800, but I'm really scared to add it all up. I mean...I really wanted Daphne to enjoy everything, but...there needs to be a goddamned limit. -_-;; Like, eating out for every meal...yeah, that gets a bit fucking expensive. Especially paying for other people...I mean, I'm all for eating out, but I can't really afford it every damned meal. But if everyone else wants to, I feel like an ass for saying no...and I'm not going to starve like an ass, so blah. And...plans getting out of hand. I mean, sure I wanted Daphne to really like things and have a good time...but I'm not a fucking millionaire. I don't even make $600 a month...how am I supposed to afford all of this? OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. Seriously.

Anyways...I'm really...stressed...and...maybe a bit depressed, so I'm not gonna babble about this week yet. It's not coming out right, so blah.

Some GG Babbling

...I really want to play WoW now. I'm a bit annoyed that Nate is playing it again. Sometimes it feels like he purposely gets it right after I uninstall it, or can't afford to play it for a while...but I know that isn't really the case. I'm just being silly (as usual, right?). It also didn't help that Eric mentioned his warlock was almost level 70, and that reminded me of my warlock, and I immediately wanted to play. Bah humbug!
I knew I shouldn't have uninstalled it...I mean, I could have played on crappy private servers.... Eck, no thanks. I only like private servers because I can get the gear that isn't so easily attainable in actual WoW, and see if it's really so good (and it usually is...). I also loved trying out new specs on private servers, since I'm always too broke to waste my money like that on actual WoW...

Yep. In other news...Daphne told me last night that Leah stepped out of the wedding...yeah. I'm a bit irked. The wedding is only a month away, and she just realizes NOW that she can't afford things? Daphne said not to be pissed at her, but I can't help but be a bit annoyed. But oh well, thinking about it more isn't going to change anything I guess. I'm just wondering if Daphne will pick someone else to be a bridesmaid, or if we'll just keep it at two now, and have an extra groomsman. But, I really doubt anyone would fit the dress, without some serious altering, and even then I doubt it would look right.

I think that's about all I really have to say...I need to babble here more often, I don't feel so stressed afterwards. GG.

My New Obsession is NOT Twilight

That's what I'd say if it were backwards day...
Yep, so I'm addicted to Twilight. I mean, it's just amazing. I heard about it a little while after it came out, but at the time I didn't hear that much about it and it easily slipped out of my mind. Then I noticed (via Facebook) that one of my cousins is completely in love with it, so I figured I'd read the book, and wow. It's been a long time since any book has actually kept me interested enough to read the whole thing so quickly (Harry Potter series actually...and I finished those not long after each book came out). Anyways, I finished Twilight so fast...and I needed to know what happened next so bad that I read the second book (New Moon) even quicker than the first one...and then the third one (Eclipse). In total, I think it took me maybe 3 days to read through all three, and this includes working, eating, sleeping...etc. Yeah, I'm a fast reader when something actually interests me. And I'm sooo excited for the fourth book to come out, even though I don't think I'll be able to afford it...gah!

"I have the best girl in the world!"

I'm really conflicted. I feel a bit sad, depressed, lonely...I'm too used to talking to Nate everyday. And when he's busy, or isn't home for me to talk to, the day feels horrible and I feel lost and messed up. It makes me second guess things, and I'm always thinking, "Maybe he doesn't really care that much. He's too busy to even talk to me." but I know somedays I'm busy too and don't get to talk to him. I feel like, a lot of my time is spent sitting here waiting for him to get back from work, the store, playing a game...whatever. I just want to say "We should take a break." but then he says something like "I thought about you all night at work." and it makes me feel like an ass and I can't say it. Or his xfire status will say "I have the best girl in the world!" and...I just can't say it.

It's Odd to Say, But...

I really like my job, which is surprising to me actually. Each time I like a job, something happens that makes me start to hate it. Maybe I shouldn't have admitted that I like it. :(
It doesn't even bug me when people walk over my freshly swept/mopped floor. I know it bugs some people, but it's like, you should go into this job expecting that to happen. It's a hotel, you shouldn't expect guests to take off their shoes and tip-toe around your wet floor. That's just stupid.
The only time it bugs me when people mess up my floor, is if it's other people that I'm working with, especially the housekeepers. Sometimes they bring down coffee cups from the rooms, and somehow manage to spill coffee all over in the elevator right after I mop it, and all the way from the elevator to the breakfast room. Why does this bug me? Because it happens at least twice a day, and even the guests don't spill their coffee around like that. Anyways...those coffee cups that the housekeepers are bringing down should have been emptied in the sinks in the room, so it's not like they're full cups of coffee, how do they manage to spill it everywhere?

Photoshop Costs HOW Much??

Okay. Hm.


I was thinking about posting yesterday, but I was too busy doing nothing, so I'll post now (actually, all I accomplished yesterday was downloading yet another program I really don't need, and weeding a part of a flower garden. To me, this qualifies as nothing.)

This weekend was pretty good. Daphne and Dan came out to get some pictures done with their wedding photographer, and they spent the whole weekend here. I feel a bit bad that I didn't hang out with them more, but I've seriously been missing Nate a lot, and the weekend is when he has his days off, so I was torn between him and them. (Also I had insanely bad cramps most of the weekend, and the Midol makes me feel even lazier and not wanting to do anything) Maybe this is bad, I don't know. But Friday night I was really depressed because we've hardly been able to talk, so I really wanted to have more of a chance to talk with him over the weekend.

Anyhow, work was pretty decent this weekend too. I actually managed to get almost 17 hours in, which is really only about 2 hours more than I've been getting the last few weeks, but I don't care, that's basically an extra...$25. It might not seem like much in the long run, but hell, I'm glad with even $5...
And actually, I talked to one of the other girls at work today, which is a huge change for me, seeing as I generally keep to myself and everyone knows this. All the other housekeepers were mad at her, because apparently she was on the schedule for night shift but didn't show up. But, according to her, she didn't even know she was on the schedule for it. Anyhow, the other housekeepers can be rude, even if they don't know the whole story, so they finished their rooms and left, leaving Mandy with a ton of rooms to do still. Now, I don't mind helping with housekeeping if they seriously need it, but I only really like making beds, and Karen knows this. So at lunch, all the other girls were leaving, and Mandy asked me if I was almost done work. I was a bit surprised she was even talking to me, since we'd never talked before, but said yes, I was almost done. She then asked if I could help her with her rooms. I was a bit hesitant, I didn't want to be stuck cleaning some toilet or anything. I asked what she needed done, and Karen who was sitting nearby mentioned that I didn't mind making beds, so Mandy said it would be great if I could help make beds. So I said sure, and was glad that I'd actually get a bit more hours.
So, I finished the rest of my stuff and went to work making more beds (I also helped Sharon make beds in the morning too) for Mandy, while listening to Mythbusters on the tv. To me, this is heaven. But only if I get to make the beds on my own. That way I can take my time and listen to the tv, and time seems to go by faster since I actually have something keeping my mind occupied, instead of thinking to myself all day.
Anyways...Mandy is really actually pretty nice, and I was amazed by how many times she thanked me and praised me on my bedmaking skills (which aren't really that great, but apparently better than hers?). It was really nice to have someone appreciate the work I was doing, and to thank me so much for it. I had always thought Mandy was kind of rude and just...not the type of person I'd see myself talking to, but she wasn't too bad in all honesty.

And, let's see. I downloaded Photoshop...err, I mean. I bought Photoshop completely legally. Yeah right. As if I'm going to pay $1000 for a program, no matter how cool it is. That's beyond retarded. I'm having a blast playing with the brushes though, and layers and overlay. I haven't really done too much more with it, but it is very, very awesome. But I still wouldn't pay $1000 for it. Maybe if I won the lottery, and wanted to buy it just for the sake of spending a shitload of money on something I can get for free...then sure.

Tight Spot

I feel trapped sometimes. Mom somehow has to come up with like $4000 by June 14th or something (for Daphne's dress & some debt), and now that the house isn't going to be sold by then, this puts her in a tight spot. I have $200, which I was HOPING to save for when my bridesmaids dress comes in, and saving the other $60 for any alterations that will have to be done on the said dress. Mom only has $220 to pay for gas, groceries, smokes, and Gary's calling cards for THREE weeks (neither of us get paid for three weeks, due to our stupid boss not paying us every two weeks like a fucking normal boss). I really feel like an ass for not just giving my mom the $200 I have, but at the same time if I give this money to her, that sets me back even more on my saving plans. UGH. WTF WTF WTF. Thinking about money makes me feel so pissed off, I just want to scream.

Sudden Realization

Well, Nate's been looking around for a job, and this morning he had a interview at some place (for security), but since he figured he wouldn't get it, he went and applied at MapleLeaf...and actually got hired there instead. I'm really happy and proud of him, even though he didn't sound enthusiastic about it at all. The way I see it is, with both of us working, there's a better chance of getting to see each other soon. <3
However, I just realized a few minutes ago, that he works on all the days that I have off...and he works night shift, whereas I work a normal day shift. So, getting to actually talk to him is going to be even more difficult. I guess it will be fine though, I know I'll miss him a lot, since I'm so used to talking to him so much everyday, but I'm just glad that he's got a job now.

Not Cool

Hm. Well, I'm kinda frustrated. I got paid, and was like "Woo! Now I have money to get a haircut, and buy a new brush, and a new shirt for work..." you know, a bunch of little things that I need to do for myself, and with some money left over to get mom something for Mother's Day. Then dad mentions that the phone is going to get cut off...and the satellite and internet probably too...so of course, I feel bad and give him almost all the money from my paycheque. Was this the best idea? I don't know. I feel bad that my dad is probably going into debt, and I'm not really doing much to help. But I shouldn't worry about this so much, even if I was working full time, what I would be able to give him to help out still wouldn't be very much.

Anyways, I guess that's why I'm frustrated. Also, that I don't really get to use the money I'm getting paid, at all. And this was stuff that I've been needing for a long time, but put it off when I get paid because other things are more important (except the N64 and WCIII, but at that time dad owed me a bit of money, which would have covered the stuff I needed..) BLAH. Now I feel like crying before work. NOT COOL.

Work is going okay I guess. I need to keep reminding myself before I go in that everything will be fine and as long as I try my best that's all that matters. So basically, trying to be positive about it. I know today I really need to think like that, since it's Saturday and things are going to get pretty busy and overwhelming for me.

Anyways, this is my strange rant thing I guess.

LoTRO, Why do you hate me so?

First, I have to say, LoTRO is awesome! I know a lot of my friends don't exactly like it, but that's because they're WoW addicts and honestly don't give other games a decent chance (I know this, because I've done it myself too. "Nothing can compare to WoW!").
Anyhow, Nate convinced me to download the LoTRO trial (I've wanted to try it, but never thought about actually downloading it...silly me.), which took about, 4 hours I'd say, to download the normal version (3.9 GB, high res is almost 7 GB I think!). Anyhow, my video card is the minimum requirment for LoTRO, so the first thing I did once it was done updating was crank all the video settings as low as they'd go, just in case, and I figured if it worked fine I could turn some of them up a bit.

For the first little while, things ran smoothly, no noticeable lag or problems with the graphics (besides them being really blurry from being on the lowest settings possible) and I fumbled my way through to about level 3 before suddenly all the movement on the screen stopped. For a brief second, I thought I was lagging, until a mass jumble of insane colors showed up across my screen...and let me tell you, I was not happy.
Now, I'm not a computer genius or anything, but I can figure out when my video card is being worked too hard, so I managed to exit LoTRO and restarted my computer. I've never really had problems with games not working on my computer, so I thought maybe if I just update the drivers, that would solve the problem. So, I updated as many as I could (some hadn't been done in a while, to be honest) and restarted and tried LoTRO online again. Things worked fine, and I thought maybe updating the drivers had fixed the problem. But after about 20 minutes or so, it happened again and I had to restart again. After a few more random tries, re-checking the video settings, updating the driver for my monitor even, it would still do the same thing after about 15-45 minutes, so I gave up and went back to my normal game, WoW.

I've only ever had minor problems with WoW, and these all happen after major-ish patches and are solved fairly easily and fast, so I was surprised when suddenly characters on WoW were showing up as straight black, and instead of seeing smoke from fires, I saw huge black squares swirling up the screen. I thought this was weird, and thought maybe WoW was conflicting with LoTRO, but didn't want to uninstall LoTRO yet since I hadn't even had it 24 hours. I closed down WoW, and noticed that my whole PC was being incredibly slow, so after I restarted I opened WoW again to see if it would happen again. After about half an hour, the same thing happened again, but I wasn't able to exit WoW at all, so I had to restart the computer. This time, I uninstalled Lotro and got rid of all the files (/cry), restarted the computer and tried WoW yet again. Same thing still happened, and an error report window for WoW came up. I sent off the error report, and this time my PC wasn't lagging, so I opened WoW again so I could see what my video settings were at, but instead of opening, I got an error message saying the I needed to have DirectX 9.0c, and should update my graphic drivers. Finding this a bit weird, since I knew I already had to had DirextX 9.0c to run a lot of things I use, and since I'd just updated my drivers not even 12 hours earlier, I tried to update them again, just in case. But, there was no update at all, so I rolled it back and restarted my PC before opening WoW...

Now, it's working, I think. I've only played for about 45 minutes and so far everything is working just fine, but I don't think I'll really know until I try to play for an hour or two, since the game ran fine for at least half an hour to an hour each time before it crashed.
What I'm kinda confused about is my drivers. Did they somehow get rolled back without me noticing, is that even possible? Or is my PC just too old and not working as well as it should be? Did LoTRO do some serious damage to my video card, or was it just some weird mistake?

In any case, Nate said he might send me his old video card, which is a nice upgrade from my current one, so maybe that will help. It's a pity though, LoTRO was so fun, even though I only got to level 7. but I had a lute! I mean, even WoW doesn't have musical instruments that you can actually play yourself. I was so excited...booo.

The Waldo Ultimatum

Honestly, this makes me laugh so hard, especially when they're standing around the monitor, "No he's at the North pole!", "That's a giant candy cane.."


The Waldo Ultimatum - Watch more Funny Videos

My Home

Today mom and dad decided to sell the house for a lot cheaper than they'd originally had it listed as. It's really depressing to think that we don't have a home to go back to anymore. It makes me so sad to think about it, and I really can't explain it. I feel really sad, and grumpy. I don't want to feel this way on my birthday.

I always just figured that mom and dad would always be there together in that house, no matter what. If I get married and have kids, we won't be going there for holidays, we won't be able to go back to a familiar place from our past, where we spent most of our lives. And I miss Amigo, I really wish we could have kept him, and I'm so angry that dad wouldn't. What an ass. He can put up with Sharon's dog, and their stupid cats..but not OUR dog? What an ass. skjhdkssgggg

Happy Birthday to me.

I'm 21!

Yay! I'm officially 21 now! /cheer

To be honest, it isn't really that exciting. However, last night I did get some nice flowers...

...and a WoW time card! Yay! Dan and Daphne also took out me and mom for my birthday supper, which was really awesome of them. So I had a pretty good evening. :D Thanks guys!

Hair Trials

Yay, today we did the hair trails for Daphne's wedding, I'm seriously really happy with how mine turned out, even though it's not the same as what I showed her that I wanted done, haha. I feel very princess-y, and it's great.

Continue Reading?

No, YOU RP or shut up!

Grrrawr.

I had a pretty really good day at work today. I went into work in a good mood, and it lasted the whole day, even though I had to work this afternoon and I was really hoping that I wouldn't have to. But, I also got off work at 3pm, so it doesn't seem like I spent my whole day cleaning up after other people. Haha.

Anyways, I had a good day, until I logged onto WoW, I guess. I always try to talk to people that I find interesting or that don't mind babbling back and forth while questing, but I guess maybe I should quit doing that. One person basically told me to RP or shut up, which made me feel really sad. He seemed like a nice guy, and it was nice to just randomly talk to someone...but I guess he didn't enjoy it that much. Damn RP servers. What's so wrong with wanting to just talk? Oh well, it's not even a big deal, but for some reason it really upset me. I guess because it made me feel like I must be pretty boring to talk to, so he had to get rid of me somehow. And I'd already stated that I didn't RP, so maybe he used that card on purpose.

Annnyyyways, Phase 3 opened up last night, I was really excited for it. I don't know why, it was just neat to see all these alliance & horde at Quel'Danas, all waiting impatiently for enough people to do the dailies to push it from 99% to 100%. It was super laggy, and people flagged themselves on purpose and stood around the questgivers. Each time I went to turn in a quest, I heard people dying and saw skeletons on the ground EVERYWHERE. Which is really kind of funny, I did about 5 quests there and handed them all in without flagging myself even with all the flagged horde. Good times anyways.

Late Resolutions

Normally I make a few resolutions for myself, but they're usually the same sorts of things over and over again, and I don't really end up sticking to them or following through with them over the course of the year.
I've been noticing my faults more and more lately, and I've been letting a lot of things hold me back in life. I can't keep living like this anymore, so I've decided that I need to change, and I'm going to do it now. Admittedly, one of the main reasons that I finally decided that I need to change, is my boyfriend Nate. I don't want my problems to get in the way of our relationship anymore.

My Resolutions:
[01] To get & hold a steady job & give my mom $300 each month.
[02] To save up & see Nate this summer.
[03] To be more open around people I'll be working with and make friends with them.
[04] To go to work every day even if I'm sick, and to work hard.
[05] To talk to Nate on the phone more.
[06] I won't let the little things bother me.

I think I'll have more to add to this later, I've been giving it thought all day, but I don't think it's complete yet.